Emotional ignorance

Negative emotions? Don’t fight it

Communicating emotions is essential to create lasting relationships. But I’m sure none of us want to display the negative ones; not inadvertently at least. I’m positive that some of the people reading this, including myself have experienced negative emotions while interacting with others and we rather them not see. Actually some of them are very intense in a way that debilitate you . Display of these emotions have a significant mark especially on first impression.


Emotions provide feedback and evaluate behavior according to a 2007 Stanford journal publication . Especially if they’re associated with fear, they become even more prevalent. That is true for the way we control and for the way we interpret others’ emotions. It’s the brain’s job to keep us safe. Emotions can form from past experiences even though it might be irrelevant for the situation at hand. Some would associate this to symptoms of social phobia, but not exclusively. Emotions can surface not because of fear of others, but also discomfort, anger and so much more that if communicated only drive people away.

My experiences used to be related to phobia and I’d be terrified of what others would thing and the way they’d react. Those days are long gone, but not the way I associate or control my emotions. Actually these days I’ve become so comfortable with my emotions, almost showing no regard of what I communicate to others. Anger, stress and frustration make me seem like a monster during the day and often people will tell me I come off as an asshole. People change their perception as they get to know me, but I don’t give everyone that opportunity unfortunately. However it beats the fear of not knowing what to make of my emotions and punishing myself for feeling one way or another.

It’s healthy to recognize our emotions.Recognizing emotions is key to relieving mental stress. Allowing oneself to reside in the present emotion, is the only way to understand it and let go. Just like myself, many people are probably used to judging emotions and often making matters worse by inflicting guilt on yourself. There’s a reason emotions exist. Recognizing them is the first to knowing why. Dwelling in them is the best way of getting to know them. Once we get to know our emotions, we can start and change them.



How Emotion Shapes Behavior: Feedback, Anticipation, and Reflection, Rather Than Direct Causation
Roy F. BaumeisterKathleen D. VohsC. Nathan DeWall Liqing Zhang
Personality and Social Psychology Review
Vol 11, Issue 2, pp. 167 - 203
First Published May 1, 2007